While I was pregnant I read many parenting books and magazines for the tips, advices and ideas. I was hoping to be knowledgeable and capable enough as parent before RJ arrives. But being a parent is not as easy as I thought. Yes, I got tips and ideas but it’s not that easy to apply in real life. I think what guided me the most is my motherly instinct.
RJ is a good girl. Aside from being sick sometimes, we didn’t encounter any problem with her. She’s very obedient, respectful and she’s doing great in school. May be this is because we talk to her ever since. But a child as she is, she has these little mistakes sometimes that need to be corrected. Between me and Rhonnel, it is me who punishes RJ the most like giving a light whip on the butt or grounding her for a day or two. I see to it that she can’t go out and play outside whenever she did something wrong. But then Rhonnel was always on the rescue and did the bargaining with me asking if I can lower my sentence in just a day. When I grounded RJ for a week, he asked me to make it just 3 days…sigh. Then we will talk to her after that it is for her own good and profit and she understands. Rhonnel seldom gets mad so I don’t understand why RJ is more afraid of him. She always does things with enthusiasm if it’s for her dad but whenever I ask her to do something I hear “Wait po” most of the time…sigh again.
But then it is me who always give in to RJ’s craves and desires especially on toys that I didn’t get any chance to have when I was a child. She will do something for us though in exchange of these material things like perfect quizzes and high grades. We do not mean and don’t have any intensions of spoiling her. We just want her to feel that we love her.
It’s an advantage that all RJ’s playmates are 3-4 years older than her. This made her to be a little mature than other children of her age. Now that she’s a big girl, the time of speaking in scope of her understanding is finally over. We can talk to her about sensitive issues and can be honest with her. It’s my job to explain to her about girly things like monthly period, pregnancy, etc. It’s Rhonnel’s job to answer queries about sports, technologies, etc. Whenever she needs something, she’ll look for me and when she needs playmate on computer games or other gadgets, she’ll ask for Rhonnel. She does know our expertise…ehehe!
If RJ is sick, we both stay up and check on her but if I am too sleepy and can’t hold on any longer, Rhonnel asks me to sleep and he’s the one who looks after RJ. Yes, we practice co-parenting and shared parenting responsibilities. We both don’t believe that Moms should be the primary caregivers and do the parenting duties alone.